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Real American Definitions By An Unpatriotic American

Below is a list of some various and sundry terms. Some terms are defined truthfully in jest. The definitions of the other terms do not matter.

American Democracy- an American's right to choose the government he or she will hate

American Sovereignty- America's right to do whatever to whomever whenever and wherever it can

Conservative- Someone who believes that the government should not impose social morals on its people

Democracy- when people take whatever peaceful actions necessary to get their government to represent them when making decisions

Democrat- Someone who believes in big business and big government (military sometimes included)

Entertainment--America's favorite anesthesia. One can publicly OD on this drug without legal ramifications.

Euphemisms R Us- where America shops. This store provides alternate explanations for any negative action. See the endorsement made by Sarah Palin, who is a regular customer.

Exceptionalism- 1) the belief that one is entitled to rule over others based on an assumed superiority, or 2) Taking one's own behavior for granted while taking exception at the actions of others

Facebook- the place in cyberspace where the ghosts of Christmas Past meet

Free Market System- an economic system that relies on man's greed to control man's greed

Fried Chicken- chicken with fiber

Gang War- the making of war on a smaller scale

Hamburger- the new Jawbreaker depending on the restaurant

Leftist- Someone who sees both Capitalism and Fascism as the archenemies of democracy

Liberal- Someone who believes that the government should not impose personal morals on its people

Mainstream Media (MSM)- everyone's favorite scapegoat. For example, while conservatives see the MSM as being too liberal, liberals and leftists see the MSM as being too conservative. Also see chameleon.

Onion Rings- onions with fiber

Patriotism- the worship of one's own nation in order to feel more significant

Propaganda- what one's opponent teaches

Republican- Someone who believes in big business and small government (military not included)

Sovereignty for all other countries besides America- the right to do whatever America gives them permission to do

Universal Health Care- the idea that every person deserves quality health care period

Unpatriotism- the refusal to worship one's own nation

War- a group participation in moral suicide and insanity

Zionism(today's version)- the selective acceptance of racism in the Middle East

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